Listed: 10 Movies Worth Seeing and Worth Never Seeing Again - Part 2

5. 2001 A Space Odyssey


Probably the least violent film on this list but certainly the most mundane, 2001 is a masterpiece, but it is also a film worth only enjoying in once. I'm a Kubrick fan, no doubt, but the slow, plodding, space-like nature of the film makes it a one-time screener.

2001 is a piece of art, and like a piece of art, it can be interpreted in many ways, but upon your first viewing of it there is really no sense in going back to it for something you missed. It's like looking at the Mona Lisa, you see it once, take it in, enjoy its beauty, and then never think to see it ever again.





4. Straw Dogs


Straw Dogs is a tame movie in terms of violence, compared to the others on this list but what makes this movie infamous is its rape scene involving his wife. What makes it worse is the aftermath when it looks as though she enjoyed it, all the while Dustin Hoffman, playing a nerdy mathmatician, has to man up and defend her honor, even though he never stands up for himself.

In end of the film is a Funny Games/Strangers type scenario where Hoffman defends his home against his wife's assailants, diving in to his most brutal nature while his wife still chastises his manhood.



3. United 93

Amid the cires of "Too soon!!! Too Soon!!!', Paul Greengrass wedged his way through the static and crafted a dignified portrait of the fateful flight of United Airlines 93 on September 11th. What transpires is a film very similar to Elephant in terms of its storytelling. There are no known actors in the film and some even played themselves in the roles they took part in during the actual events of September 11th.

The movie is beautiful and simple in its execution, but we all know what happens in the end, and no matter how heroic the deeds of this film, it isn't the type of movie you throw in the player at your next party. It's heart-wrenching and anger-inducing and nothing you want to keep putting yourself through.




2. The Happening

Most of the films on this list are quality films that have tough imagery to take in. The Happening is the exact oppisite of these movies. It is a truly downright awful film that should be seen to be believed, and then put out of memory for eternity. The film teeters on "So bad, it's good" status, but the problem is that it takes itself so seriously. Films like Troll 2 or Army of Darkness are terrible films, but there is so much joy in watching them over and over again.

The insane performances of the actors in the film and the all around reveal and implementation of the villain comes off hysterically funny, but leaves nothing to be desired to watch it again. Not to mention the headache-inducing dialogue. What happened M. Night Shyamalan, and no that wasn't a pun. Here's a gem for you.






1. Natural Born Killers

Granted, Oliver Stone's, drug-induced slap in the face to a media and violence obsessed culture has quite the followingm but I entertain the opinion that this movie hates its audience and wants to rub their noses in all kinds of mess. Natural Born Killers is something to be seen, I won't deny that. The psycadelic visuals and all-around psychotic story-telling is a unique film experience.

But what turns me off to the film is that not one character in the whole movie is likeable. Woody Harrelson and Juliette Lewis are of course our killers, but the cast of whacky side characters are just as demeneted and disgusting as they are. I just can't get into this movie, and after seeing it once I know it will never grace my eyes with its presence again.

Listed: 10 Movies Worth Seeing and Worth Never Seeing Again

10: Audition:


Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, especially if that woman has a knack for torture and dismemberment. Yes Takeshi Miike's ode to deranged beauties is an odd mix of romance, surrealism, and shear brutality. Consider this film the Jaws of date movies, because underneath the facade of a gorgeous face, there could be an attention whoring homicidal maniac lurking.

The movie has two acts. We begin with a widower craving the affection of a good woman and the compassion of a good mother for his son. His friend, a movie producer, hatches a scheme to hold a pseudo-fake audition for a film to hook him up with a lovely lady. The woman he picks is a quiet ballet dance, Asami, who has a clingy nature and a cryptic past.

Audition is one of those movies that climaxes in the final ten minutes. Asami realizes that her new man isn't as devoted as she'd hoped he'd be and decides to punish him by delicately torturing the living hell out of him. It's a hard scene to take in, and I find it immensely more disturbing to watch than a film like Hostel, because the scene is more personal and Asami sells her psychosis so well. As she "gently, gently" dissects this good-natured man.






9: Funny Games (U.S. Edition)



Speaking of torture here's a whole hour and a half of it. Micheal Haneke's shot for shot English language re-make of his own Austrian movie is a mentally exhausting ride. Anything more unapologetic than this movie is basically a snuff film. Haneke pretty much takes the slasher film and throws out all of the rules by introducing us to the killers from the very beginning and robbing the victims of any chance of survival.

This movie is psychological torture, from the start of the insanity, the killers make a bet with this poor upscale family will be dead by morning and through a series of "games" prove that there is no chance for any of them. Haneke burns the kid gloves with both of his films by incorporating what is generally a no-no in horror films, and that is putting kids in danger and making them as accountable for being killed along with the adults.

This is what makes Funny Games a tough watch. In one particular scene the boy manages to escape and for what seems like eternity, we watch him attempt to hide from his pursuers, only to be caught yet again. I'm fairly desensitized to horror-fare, but I practically had my hands over my eyes the entire scene.

The ultimate message of this film feels like a giant spit in the face to a violence obsessed culture. People hate this movie, and rightfully so, but what's the difference concerning this movie and a movie like Saw or Friday the 13th?





8: The Passion of the Christ


Still going strong with the torture theme, we have Mel Gibson's prophecy...er...directorial depiction of the death of Jesus Christ. All in all I won't knock Gibson for a solid film, but where is the replay value in a movie like this?

Re-reading the the crucificition over and over again in the Bible is one thing, but watching it transpire on film does nothing but leave a pit in your stomach. Granted I'm sure flocks of preachers just love to use this film as the gateway to guilt-trip lane but for me, once was enough.






7: Requiem For a Dream


With maybe an exception to "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" never has there been a film that captured the hardships of drug culture than Darren Aronofsky's junkie-fest. We start under the umbrella of hope as we watch these four characters use drugs to their benefit, be it money or fame. But as time goes by, and increased addiction sets in, we watch each character travel down their respective paths of outlandish destruction, culminating in a final act of mind bending anthologies.

Jared Leto contracts a lesion of doom, causing him to be one appendage short. Marlon Wayans finds himself surrounded by a prison population that doesn't take too kindly to the color of his skin. Ellen Burstyn pops one diet pill too many and winds up at the business end of shock pads. And of course, in the most infamous of scenes, Jennifer Connelly finds herself center stage with another drugged out woman performing acts of perversion for salivating old farts.

It's all one giant punch in the stomach and should serve as a true lesson in promoting a drug free America.




6: Elephant

Balls...That's what it takes to make a movie like this. Grapefruit-sized, brass balls. Gus Van Sant happened to have a pair handy when he made this movie and what occur ed is a truly nightmarish, yet beautiful film that should be seen and then carved out of your mind.

In an era where high school students are more likely to be gunned down than a gang member in Compton. Van Sant decided to take the plunge and stage a Columbine-esque massacre on celluloid for all to see. Using completely unknown and completely inexperienced high-school students for his cast, Van Sant mercilessly lets loose a horrifying fifteen minute sequence that pulls no punches.

Like many of these films, the pain comes in a small dose, which is preceded by a fairly tame and mundane story. Elephant is the poster child for that, it literally follows a number of students for a day before the chaos begins. It's a chore to watch, but it really hits the scenario home.





5-1 Coming Soon!!!